Kevin Hart Flexed On The Oscars

Kevin Hart decided to step down as host of the 91st annual Academy Awards. He was announced as the host on Wednesday (12/05/18) and was out by Friday (12/07/18). He informed his fans via an Instagram post of his decision to walk away: 

"I have made the choice to step down from hosting this year's Oscar’s... I do not want to be a distraction on a night that should be celebrated by so many amazing talented artists. I sincerely apologize to the LGBTQ community for my insensitive words from my past. I'm sorry that I hurt people... I am evolving and want to continue to do so. My goal is to bring people together not tear us apart. Much love & appreciation to the Academy. I hope we can meet again."

According to his IG post he was given an ultimatum by the Academy. He could make a formal public apology for his homophobic tweets and stay on as the host or he would be replaced. Kevin chose to walk away. In his response he highlighted the fact that he had indeed apologized for his past statements and those apologies would be just as easy to find as his controversial tweets were.

Social media is the judge, jury, and executioner for those living in the public’s eye. Twitter and Facebook are great tools for gauging what people are thinking at any given moment, but the often-caustic environment found on social media makes civil discussions almost impossible. Kevin Hart apologized for his past tweets, but those apologies didn’t trend like this controversy has; in the world of social media that’s the equivalent of them not existing. 

This isn’t an attempt to delegitimize the criticisms he’s faced for his tweets. Kevin Hart isn’t above reproach, but its’s disingenuous not to acknowledge the roll group think plays in social media controversies. Once a topic trends, it becomes popular to have an opinion about said topic. There are people tweeting about this who have never made one public statement of solidarity with the LGBTQIA+ community. Some of have never watched the Academy Awards, and others have never seen Kevin Hart perform. This doesn’t mean their opinions are null and void, but all opinions aren’t equal. There are people participating in this conversation for narcissistic reasons.

This isn't my soapbox. I’ve made a ton of inappropriate statements I wish I could have back, but there are three things about this situation that make me very uncomfortable:

1) The Virtue Signaling: A lot of people weigh in on hot button issues in an attempt to absolve themselves of their own past problematic behavior. I have news for them: it doesn’t work that way. If you’ve laughed, or even snickered a little, at Bernie Mac's "milk and cookies" routine you are the fertilizer that helped grow Kevin Hart’s troubling tweets. 

2) The Doxing: There are people who sit around and scour other people's social media accounts looking for anything that could hurt them. These aren’t private investigators, they aren’t vetting people for important jobs. These people have too much free time on their hands. They would rather use their time tearing someone else apart than building themselves up. 

3) The Accountability: Social media has found a way to hold everyone accountable for what they say or do but the President of the United States. Donald Trump made hundreds of statements just as offensive as Kevin Hart’s tweets. We live in a society that holds comedians to higher ethical standards than politicians. 

Kevin Hart is out as the host of the Oscar’s. This won’t make one person affected by homophobia any safer. This doesn’t make the Academy Awards an institution with integrity. We haven’t solved any of the underlying issues that led to him thinking the way he did about the gay and lesbian community. We put a band aid on a bullet wound. Sadly, there are people on social media hailing this as some great victory for LGBTQIA+ rights.

Why Are We So Depressed?

Sometimes we want what we want even if we know it’s going to kill us.

Donna Tartt

Sigmund Freud believed most people channeled their death instinct outwardly. The "Death Drive" or that tendency towards self destructive behavior is real. I don't care if you subscribe to Eastern orthodoxies, Western religious dogmatism, or postmodern psychoanalytic theory, we can't deny the fact that there are some people hell bent on destroying themselves.

Self destruction takes on many forms. For some it's alcohol and drug abuse; for others it's engaging in extremely dangerous or risky behavior. No matter the symptom(s) the underlying cause tends to be some form of depression. What has changed in society? Are we more depressed now than before? Why do so many people feel like they are trapped in lives they can't escape?

This isn't a frivolous rhetorical exercise. I'm asking broad, open ended questions for a reason: maybe we need to spend more time thinking, with an open mind, about what's happening around us? How can we possibly help anyone if we haven't asked ourselves tough questions, or examined our own self destructive behaviors? 

I'm not Monday morning quarterbacking depression or any mental health issue. This isn't amateur psychology hour. I'm asking anyone still reading to think about the big questions, and some of the seemingly small questions that have big answers. Who are you? Who am I? How much influence does society, class, culture, and economics play in determining the answers we find? Why are we so depressed?

Happy Veteran's Day!

http://thoughtwrestler.tumblr.com/post/180001429461/happy-veterans-day

Overcoming Racists Imagery: A Trip Inside The Mind

Who else is tired of their social media feeds being flooded with viral videos of Black people being harassed and/or questioned by overly concerned white people? I’m not saying we shouldn’t watch and share these videos. Ignoring this issue won’t make it go away. These videos serve a purpose, but I’m tired of seeing them. I’m tired of anti-Blackness. I’m tired of people deputizing themselves to police us. I’m tired of people assuming our presence needs to be explained.

This kind of harassment is the child of ignorance and hatred. Unnecessarily following, questioning, or calling the cops on anyone can create a potentially dangerous situation. Not everyone is going to pull out a phone and start recording. There are people capable of going from calm to pissed off before their antagonist can dial 911, but even if the person being harassed keeps their cool they are put in the ominous position of having to explain themselves to law enforcement.

These videos are new, but this behavior isn’t. Black bodies have been monitored and surveilled since the first slave ships dropped anchor. The moment Black bodies are “out of place” our patriotic friends spring into action. Their fear and unarticulated assumptions create drama where none exists.
I know Black people who are policing themselves. I know people who have decided that eating at certain restaurants or shopping in some malls isn’t worth risking a potential confrontation. This is psychologically exhausting and emotionally damaging.

We don’t have to be prisoners to this madness. Self-exploration, self-awareness, and ultimately, self-knowledge is our way out. Finding yourself doesn’t mean you won’t be victimized by racism, but it can keep you from internalizing the experience. We should be upset by racist behavior, we should confront racists tropes, but we shouldn’t allow the mania of others to limit our freedom. We can train our minds and strengthen our spirits.

Plato thought there were three components to the soul: the logical, the spirited, and the appetite; Sigmund Freud lectured about the three parts of the personality: the id, the ego, and the superego; Frantz Fanon wrote extensively about decolonializing the mind; The Nation of Gods and Earths have been teaching about self-actualization since the 60’s. There’s a lot of information across a variety of disciplines readily available for anyone serious about overcoming the psychological effects of trauma.

What works for me (if it is working) may not work for you. I’ve found that fighting the urge to reject objectification helped me understand they way people look at me and how I react to their reactions. I think of myself as an object, a subject, and an agent. This allows me to focus on the things I can control. I define my personal trinity in the terms of me, myself, and I.

• Me: (object) a canvas where society projects its understanding (and misunderstandings) about language, culture, gender, race, sex, and class.
• Myself: (subject) The internal battleground where assumptions, prejudices, and preconceived notions are either internalized and accepted, or confronted and defeated.
• I: (agent) The external being whose actions reflect the conscious and unconscious struggles I face.

We are constantly objectified: all of us. Every interaction we have starts with a look that attempts to understand us or place us in a category. At any given time, we have a number of character traits projected onto us. Those initial judgments are part of life; they will always be there, but we don't define us. We will never know freedom if we don’t find a way around social stigma. One can be bound without physical shackles.

Our challenge is to diminish the power judgment holds over us while simultaneously elevating our self-worth. The phobias and “isms” plaguing our society flourish because of intellectual laziness. Ignorance and hatred aren’t going anywhere, but we have to remember that the hateful and ignorant aren’t the majority. We can’t fall into the trap of trying to refute every negative stereotype about Blackness. Ultimately, the most important judgment we face lives on the other side of a mirror.