Our lives are made up of the total days we've lived. These days are, in essences, what define us. The idea of running from your past is parochial; no matter where you go, you carry your past with you. We live in a society in which it's easier to distract ourselves from the reality of our situations than to face them. The use of alcohol and drugs (legal prescription, over-the-counter, and illegal) combined with all of the distractions of our technology driven culture have comfortably sedated us into a false reality. The fact is: the booze wear off, the high comes down, and we're left where we started; we are Sisyphus rolling that rock up the hill when we run from life. We wake up with a hangover and all of those same problems waiting on us. The examined life is hard! The idea of "thought wrestling" isn't a new concept, but rather a choice people have been making all along. Thoreau once said, "what can I do to awaken my sleeping neighbor?" I don't have a silver bullet full of answers; no one has a monopoly on the truth: we can make claims, but we could be wrong. It takes courage to look deep inside ourselves and question what we believe. I have to engage in this kind of deep Socratic dialog. This is my nicotine, alcohol, and drug addiction rolled into one. There are times when I'm more alive by myself with a book than when I'm surrounded by people. All of my problems in life were a result of my unwillingness to face what was right in front of me.