Friday, January 17, 2020

They Can't Hurt Your Character!

Hey, hey you! I want to remind you of a simple fact: your character isn't affected by what people say about you. Your character is far more valuable than your reputation. How you feel about you is more important than any validation you can get from society. 

There will always be people who don't understand you. That's life! All of us are vulnerable to the pit falls that make clear speaking and plain understanding impossible. The Rorschach test is a great example of this. Every time you see a butterfly someone else could be seeing a bat. This is an honest mischaracterization, but we know there are people who willfully attempt to destroy our character. 

We have to come to grips with the fact that there are times when we will be misunderstood, falsely accused and/or unfairly judged. This hurts! There's no easy way to deal with this, but we can overcome it. Your reputation is a derivative of your character. What people say doesn't matter nearly as much as what you do.

Here's a few things to always remember:

1. Be consistent: your daily actions are a truer reflection of who you are than gossip or innuendo.

2. Be real: authenticity isn't always appreciated, but it's so rare people notice it.

3. Be fair: leave as much room for the humanity of others as you expect.

4. Be nice: avoid insulting people who misunderstand you; it's​ a form of confirmation bias.

5. Be forgiving: life is hard enough without adding revenge, restitution or retribution to your daily to-do list. 

When you close your eyes at night the only validation you need is in between your ears. Once you have done your best the rest is out of your hands.